Funny!

I find it funny how after the serious post titled The Decision, the latest chatbox comment asks whether I kuat makan or not. :D

The Decision

Sometimes I just wish I have more of myself rather than more time to do more things. Being in USM for the 4th week, it has been a time of setting priorities; which to commit, which to leave behind, which church to go, what to do at this time. Things like that.

During that 4-week period, I've come to realised that there are many things I want to join or do (24 seasons drum, Christian Fellowship, debate, church activities) and also time is no friend of mine. I suppose this dilemma is present for all since we all share the 24-hour cycle, but for me (and Christians perhaps), things are a little different.

Having a higher authority over me, I owe God my service.

By service, it means to be faithful to His work and be an active participant in whatever measure I can.

By service, it means to devote time to His work.

By service, it means to leave your interests, no matter how big they are, to do His work.

By service, it means God is first, and you are second.

It took me a while to cope with that, with thoughts like; 

God wouldn't make me sacrifice my interests for His sake.

God would surely leave some time for me to use right?

Surely I can have freedom over what I want to do.

These thoughts were, at the least, self-centred. Having committed myself to Him, I suppose it is only right that His work be first over my interests. God isn't being mean by making me do so, He just deserves it.

The moment I accepted the privilege of being His son, I accepted also the responsibility that came;

Him first, everything else second. 

I've learned that when there are conflicts of interests between these two, I need to select the one that best benefits God, not me. Tough lesson, but valuable nonetheless.

Not like God preferred His own interests over mine when He sent Jesus to die for my sins anyway.

It's ALLLLIIIVVVEEE (Ace Ventura style)

Yep, the blog lives again after a 1 year lay-off. I stopped blogging for a number of reasons:

1. Sometimes the Internet was immensely slow, especially when the mood to blog was high, so the feeling died.

2. I lacked creativity to write; in other words, the writers' block.

3. I was playing lots of games.

So why start again? It's because:

1. Internet here is quite good. Every 4 rooms share a router, so it's fast and rarely slow.

2. I removed the block.

3. There're no more many games to play. T.T

I also thought it'd be a good way to update myself so that my faithful 8 followers can keep up on what's happening here. Your faithfulness shall be rewarded with nonsense posts I guess!

Anyway, it was a tiring one week of orientation. Sleeping at 2 (sometimes 3) and waking up at 6, crazy-packed schedules which only allow 20-minute meals (which upon lining up takes 10 minutes+), and the 20-minute walk from hostel to meeting place each day. Truth be told, I think I got thinner already from all the walking. Still, it was a good week because I got to make new friends of the same wavelength, different wavelength, and those of a particular distant universe.

The orientation ended on a high (meaning highest form of torture) with a 3-days-2-nights camp in Cinta Alam Kelimat, Perak. During my 3 days there, I only got to bathe once because of the tight schedule. On the first night, they let us off at 12am. I had to do patrol work at 1 and with my shift ending at 2, was looking forward for some good rest. Rest though, only belongs with the dead and we had to go for jungle trekking immediately after my shift. Came back around 6+ before the next activity started again at 7am.

Had a presentation to perform that night, and with 12 groups performing, the 6 worst would be sent to 'rendam' in the river. Well, my group was one of them. 'Rendaming' was fine, but before we could get to the river, we had to crawl through the mud which was disgusting to say the least. >.<

In my 3rd day there, the camp commandant was especially strict on us. He made us do many push-ups, claiming that we weren't disciplined and united. His favourite stunt was the 'ukur padang' where we would have to lie flat on the field and roll all the way to the other side. If we didn't count together, he'd make us roll back to the other end of the field. In between the torture, he'd teach some things about taking care of the environment, and also unity, but no need until like that gua. What he did was like killing a fly by running a 5-ton truck over it when you could just have done a Karate-Kid chopstick kill. I guess the more severe the longer the effect lasts though.

So all in all, I'm kinda glad the 1st week was over. Class was on yesterday and it was interesting. I'm the first batch of students who'd be undergoing a 4-year course in Mass Communications instead of 3 years that have been going on before this. They're teaching us about the history of it now which I like and the lecturers so far have been nice.

Looking forward to coming back this week for Sharlissa's wedding and meeting my family again. Oh wheeee, oh whee oh whee, am baba wei!

Did You Watch...

The match between Manchester United and Chelsea last night? I'm not talking about my sis and her roommate but the actual clubs. Well, Man U won the game 3-1, but the game was interesting not because 4 goals were scored, but the amount that weren't instead.

One fell when wanting to score.

One slipped while taking a penalty kick.

One keeper running to the opponent's goal only to realise he was at the wrong side.

But the greatest of the miss belonged to Fernando Torres. He rounded the keeper very well and was actually one-on-one with the goal! At first sight, I thought he was going to score but he missed. I was more flabbergasted, blabbergasted, dumbfounded, smartunfounded than being happy he didn't score. Click here for the miss.

Anyway, I just pity him for the miss. He was playing well up until that point. As a striker, your job is to score. Rounding off the keeper is a bonus but the core you must fulfill. And sadly, he missed the target.

It's just like a student preparing for the exam only to realise the exam was 2 months ago and he missed it.

It's just like an accountant missing an obvious number and the accounts come up with a huge mistake.

It's just like a lawyer getting her files ready for the big trial and upon walking in the court with brimming confidence, realises she's in the wrong court and missed the right one.

How sad indeed.

Ah well, I checked the dates and phew, STPM ain't 2 months ago!

Only He Knows

Just read a blog of a friend of mine. Always seemed so cheerful, but that blog had none of it. I guess people often put up a brave front but inside, they're just hurt and shattered. If not for that blog, how am I to know?

I suppose only God knows, and hence the only One who can help. It is comforting to know God does help through us friends.

A Motivator Came...

To school to well, motivate the students. It was a very good presentation about inspiring ourselves to keep moving forward and never giving up. What felt a bit weird though was the fact that God was never mentioned, even when Calvin, the motivator, said who was the one we listen to the most. But well, I guess that's true among many of us, even Christians are guilty of it.

But what made the presentation contradict itself was when he showed a clip of Nick Vujicic.


Nick here has Tetra-amelia syndrome, a disability which results in losing your limbs. What Calvin wanted to bring out was that Nick of all people, could be the first to give up but chose instead to fight on, to listen to his voice, and to pursue greatness. He stood on his own two feet so to say, and stood tall. So we with limbs, should follow suit.

But is that how it really went?

Calvin probably didn't know the part where Nick contemplated suicide because of his condition. He felt hopeless and couldn't find meaning in his life. But what really changed him wasn't the voice inside him, but the voice of God.

It was in his hopelessness that he found God.

In his struggles.

In his inability.

In all these he found comfort and strength in God. God became and is his limbs till this day.

Many people in the world today are always telling us to push through things by ourselves.

To conquer the world.

To win.

But what about the helpless? Does it become a 'the strong survive, the weak die' situation?

It took Nick's helplessness to realize he needed God in his life.

To realize strength comes not from himself, but from God.

To realize life is hopeless without Him.

If it takes a sense of hopelessness and helplessness for people to come to God, then I hope they do, and then find hope and help altogether.

Who did Nick listen to?

He listened to God the most.

His video can be found here.

I Was Like...

'Woah, you're that fat already?'

No, I'm not saying any girl is fat or anything, but Ronaldo!

And no, not Cristiano Ronaldo.

If he's fat, we're all doomed.

I'm talking about the Brazilian Ronaldo. Yeah, he was awesome and stuff. Won 2 World Cups and holds the record for most goals scored in World Cup with 15 goals! He was fit at that time and had speed and strength!

Glory days!

Yeah, but look at him now. T.T

I DON'T WANNA BE LIKE THAT!